


Life is a Game of Chance

by Hugofthunder



Series: Life is a game of chance [1]
Category: Persona 5, Persona Series
Genre: Eventual Smut, F/F, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Gen, Post-Canon, Real Life, Romantic Fluff, Sexuality
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-09-04
Updated: 2017-09-24
Packaged: 2018-12-23 14:59:38
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 15,316
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11992152
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hugofthunder/pseuds/Hugofthunder
Summary: One year after returning home Akira Kurusu returns to Tokyo hoping to change his luck and reclaim the friendships he left behind. What he thinks will be an easy transition will send shockwaves across his group of friends everything will change as transitions to adulthood will effect each relationship differently. In the process they will discover the bonds that brought them together may bend but ultimately they with always be the Phantom Thieves of Hearts.





	1. Step right up

Akira stood behind the counter at Lablanc, his back was turned to the door as he marveled at the variety of beans. It seemed as if there was more than the last time he had been there. “the coffee has been so popular I had to increase my stock” Sojiro yelled from the kitchen. As usual the older man already knew what was on Akira’s mind.

There were so many choices, Akira became excited to try each one and have Sojiro teach him the perfect way to brew each type. He quietly wondered if He would finally be allowed to make his own blends. As simple as it seemed he was excited at the prospect of a quiet life filled with studies, his friends, and working at Lablanc. It was what he needed after the hell he faced alone the past year,

Akira was startled out of his thoughts by the sound of a familiar bell. A woman entered in through the front door she paused for a moment noticing Akira almost startled by his presence. She collected herself then strode up to the counter taking a seat right in front of where he was standing. “I’ll have a Jamaican Blue Mountain” She said completely ignoring any pleasantries. She was different than he remembered. Something about her seemed calm… lighter, she was different in her demeanor This was not the woman who he had known a year ago.  “In a hurry, as always I see Prosecutor Niijima” Akira gave a small smile. “ I see your work ethic has not changed in the time I have been gone”

Sae paused trying to pick her words carefully as not to give him the upper hand “Actually it is SIU Director Niijima now. I see that your information is outdated Kurusu. I am surprised Makoto would have already told you. It happened shortly after you left to go back home.”

Akira was taken aback by that last piece of information. It was true the Phantom Thieves and himself were not as close as they had been over the past year of his absence, but he was shocked that in all their conversations during his absence Makoto had never shared the news of her sister’s promotion. Last he heard she had wanted to become a defense attorney, he still had the business card she gave him on his last day in Tokyo.

“That news is quite a surprise.” He managed to finally say after silence that seemed like forever. “What happened to changing the lives of others from the other side of the courtroom? You had such high ideals when I left”

“I didn’t think I would be able to go back to be honest. I was so jaded by my experience under the old regime and I know that I let it build a palace of desire in my heart that tore me from reality and from my sister. Yet this was my opportunity to make the rules, I wanted a sense of true justice to return to the SIU and I knew only I would be able to bring that change, so I accepted the position.” She searched his face for approval. She wasn’t sure why It mattered to much to her but she wanted him to know she was trying to do right by him, even if it wasn’t in the way she had originally promised.

Akira opened his mouth to say something, at that moment Sojiro emerged from the kitchen with two large plates of curry. “Oh Niijima-san I didn’t realize you were here.” With that he slid a plate of curry in her direction and went back to the kitchen to make himself another plate, the wink he gave Akira on his way caused the young man to turn a shade pink.

Just as Akira finished Sae’s coffee the door opened again. Makoto entered followed by Ann and Haru. “Hi Boss, I hope you don’t mind…” Makoto stopped midsentence as she noticed Akira behind the counter casually handing her sister a cup of coffee and smiling. “AKIRA!” Ann yelled with a slight squeak, “we didn’t think you would be back for another month.” Akira quickly turned his head and noticed all three women staring at him he knew he was in trouble. He put his hand behind his head and blushed “yeah I asked Boss if I could come back and stay here for the month before I move across town for School. He was more than happy to put me back to work”.

 “I don’t understand…why you didn’t tell any of us you would be here early” Makoto growled as she set her stuff down in the first booth in the corner. Meanwhile Ann and Haru were more than happy to drop everything and tackle Akira behind the counter. Both of them were talking a mile a minute, Akira didn’t know what questions to answer first. Sae was so enamored with the situation she let a small smile slip from her lips. It was a small crack in the mask of seriousness and duty she normally wore. It would have been completely lost in the moment if Makoto had not glanced in her sister’s direction. She had never seen that look on Sae’s face it was inquisitive but not in a serious way and there was a quiet joy about the look she had in her eyes as Akira picked himself off the floor laughing. It was a look Makoto knew well she had had it many times but had never acted on the feelings behind it. She caught herself staring at the scene before her _Is she flirting_ … _Maybe she is…nah… she would never_ Makoto quietly thought to herself.

Sojiro emerged from the kitchen again “ I thought I heard more company it’s a good thing I knew to make extra curry” He set down three plates at the middle booth. “there will be plenty of time for Akira to explain please have a seat and eat”

Sae finished her coffee realizing she felt a bit out of place. “I have to get back to the office. We are working on a big case. I will see you at home Makoto.” She grabbed her bag to rush out the door “See you at home Sis” Makoto yelled after her. “Please come again soon SIU Director Niijima” Akira yelled from behind her as she opened the door and passed the threshold, it was disarming, she felt a slight burning in her cheeks as they turned red. _this feeling…He is such a lothario… it would never work. I am sure he is just being a flirt for fun anyways._ She rationalized as she closed the door and quickly walked away gain more composure with each step.

Ann, Haru, and Makoto looked at each other than boss, then Akira several times “what was that all about” Makoto asked demandingly as she looked Akira square in the eyes. “I was just being nice” he replied pushing his glasses back and smiling there was something in his grey eyes though that told a different story. “stop being so serious Mako-chan” Ann threw a napkin at her playfully. “I wish you would have told us you were coming back early, we could have had a party.” Haru said hoping to defuse some of the tension. “Do the others know you are back?” Makoto snorted she was in full officer Niijima mode now.

Akira’s face dropped, he knew that he should have told them he would be back but he couldn’t bring himself to discuss the reasons why. He had struggled being home everything and everyone grew without him while he was away on probation. People he thought were his friends no longer trusted him, he threw himself into school and managed to secure a part time job even though he had a hard time finding anyone who would hire him. His parents made it worse, they tried to move on and ignore the whole incident which left him with so many questions. He just didn’t fit anymore and when his relationships with his friends in Tokyo seemed to fall by the way side because people were busy with their lives he fell into depression. His once cocky exterior seemed to crumble under the weight of the world, he was drowning. So, he had asked Sojiro if he could move into the attic for a month it was the once place he felt at home and he needed a change in scenery. He couldn’t bear to tell the others that he felt broken, and didn’t want to be a burden on their lives… so he lied. “I was bored back home and made a last min decision to hop on a train. I literally called boss from the train to see if my room was available. Don’t worry Makoto no one knew… I am not keeping secrets from you.” He forced a smile hoping she wouldn’t see through the mask he was wearing.

Makoto knew something was off in his story but let it go anyways, there would be another time to interrogate her good friend. At this point she knew the others just wanted to enjoy his company and she had a lot to think about now that he was back in town.

After everyone finished their curry Sojiro instructed them that he was going to close up early, but to enjoy the café until they were finished catching up. Akira gave him a nod indicating his thanks and relaxed into the booth. He felt normal for the first time in a long time as they talked will into the night about everything and yet nothing. It was like no time had passed, it was familiar, comfortable, and safe.

Makoto looked at her watch it was already 2:30 am “oh shit I have an 8 am forensics class. I didn’t realize it was so late.” “I am sorry I need to go home and get some sleep” She paused looking at his eyes “I was hoping we could talk some more after class if that will work with your schedule?”

“its ok, Boss said I could have the next few days off. I will come see you tomorrow let me know when you are done and I will meet you at your place in Shibuya” Akira looked into her eyes searching for a reason why she seemed so insistent to speak to him alone.

After Makoto departed Ann looked at Akira “That was really weird.” She finally blurted out. “I have not seen her act that icy since she was stalking us around school trying to figure out if we were the phantom thieves.”

Haru pulled out her phone and sent a text to Makoto

                  **Are you ok?**

**No but hopefully I will be.**

**Is this about Akira being back?**

**Yes… I know something is up with him. I think he knows.**

**Talk to him it will be ok.**

**I just… How do I tell him about the past year… about why I abandoned him?**

**We all will need to have that discussion with him eventually. He will understand.**

She furrowed her brow and put her phone back in her pocket. Haru knew now was not the time for deep conversations.  “Akira do you think I could sleep here tonight, the trains have stopped running and I don’t want to call my driver and wake him up.” She stretched her arms and yawned as she got up to stretch her legs.

“Of course, Haru. Please take the bed upstairs.”

She thanked him and retired upstairs.

Akira looked at Ann, “would you like me to get you a cab home or…” She stopped him mid-sentence “I don’t have a shoot tomorrow. Let’s talk it has been so long since we just sat together”

Ann told him about her life as a model. They talked about her struggles with breaking out in the industry, all the places she has traveled, and her continued love of crapes. When the subject hit relationships her eyes grew dark and quiet. He could sense sadness in her pause. “There is someone but they don’t know. I have loved them forever but I honestly don’t think they see me as anything more than a friend” She finally blurted out. “I have tried to move on to see other people but no matter where I go they keep a constant place in my mind. So, I have just thrown myself into my work… hoping one day it would be reciprocated.” His eyes tried to search for a clue as to who this person might be but he could tell she had a hard-enough time confiding in him as it was, so he didn’t push his luck. “Ann, I know some day either this person will come around or you will meet someone who will treat you with all the love and care you deserve.” He said it sincerely hoping that she realized he thought the world of her.

Akira crossed to the other side of the booth and held Ann in a warm embrace knowing she was hurting and hoping he could ease her pain if only for a moment. She cried into his shoulder letting go of all her fear and anxiety, she knew she would have to be brave but tonight was not the night for that. Instead she laid her head on his should as the both drifted in and out of sleep content to be within each other’s presence.

There they stayed until the sun began to rise over the café. As the Birds chirped outside they both knew it was time to come back to reality.

Ann rose and yawned “I think it is time for me to go to bed.”  “would you like me to walk you to the station?” Akira asked her warmly. “No, I think I can manage.” Ann picked up her things and headed out. “it was nice to see you Akira” Ann beamed as she looked at him her blue eyes bright and happy.

Akira took a moment in silence to himself he reflected on his life. He knew it wasn’t going to be easy but he was just happy to feel like he belonged again. As he drifted off to sleep he had no idea the challenges that awaited him and his friends over the next few months.

The relationships they had built with each other would be tested and pushed to the limit. They had withstood so much as the Phantom Thieves, he had risked everything for them and they for him, but this was different.  Growing into responsibility as an adult and the emotional rollercoaster that would follow made infiltrating palaces and changing hearts look like a game.

Akira closed his eyes and fell asleep dreaming of all the possibilities he and his friends could achieve. For the moment that was more than enough to leave a smile on his face.

 

 

 

 

 

 


	2. Roulette

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Akira goes to Makotos house where he is met by Makoto, Sae, and a very emotional surprise...

Sae pursed her lips as she flipped through the file on her desk. The wall clock struck 5 pm, she knew she should head home and have dinner with Makoto but there was something nagging her about this case. It seemed like a simple case of assault and yet the investigation was not making sense, the victim was missing and the witness had a hard time telling consistent story.

The case was not the only thing on her mind though, ever since she saw Akira Kurusu the day prior he had been in the back of her mind. He was not the same young man from a year ago. His hair was still messy and flopped over his glasses, his eyes still had an aspect of kindness and responsibility about them, but his demeanor was changed he carried himself as if he had been to war not home to finish high school. Everything about him intrigued Sae. Yet, she knew any sort of relationship was out of the question. She had to keep an air of respectability about her and dating a former phantom thief/ convicted criminal could discredit every major case she ever argued. Not to mention their significant age difference It could be the end of her career.

Sae laughed at herself for even having such ridiculous thoughts. There was no indication that Akira would even reciprocate her feelings and to make matters worse her sister had long held a torch for the former leader of the phantom thieves, there was no way she would do anything to jeopardize the relationship it took so long for her to cultivate with Makoto. The bond and trust they had formed over the past year was to fragile and precious to lose over a guy.

She resolved to throw herself into her work and forget about the way he made her smile and clutch her chest on her way out of Leblanc, that pipe dream was something that was never meant to be…

Sae looked at the clock again it was half past 6, Makoto must be getting worried now she thought. Maybe she could watch a movie with Makoto tonight to take her mind off everything. She closed the file placed it in her purse, shut off the lights, and headed home.

 

Makoto worked diligently in the kitchen making chicken yakisoba. She hoped talking to Akira would be the first step towards repairing their relationship. Her mind was fraught with worry they had left things so raw, she had promised to call, visit, and wait for him yet in the end communication had just dropped off and each of them went on with their lives independent of the other.

The last sign of communication she had received from him was a hand-written letter addressed to her formally. He had informed her that he understood that he was hard to be with, that the situation they found themselves in was too tough for two people so young to navigate and he freed her of any responsibility should she decide to move on.

Makoto remembered the tears rolling down her cheeks as she hung on each word trying to make sense of it all. The letter seemed sudden and she had wondered why he went through all the trouble of writing a letter rather than calling. It all felt impersonal and she honestly didn’t know how to respond so she let it go, she knew the others would be there for him, they had to be. Instead she chose to throw herself into her school work at university rather than deal with all the emotions that had built up inside her.

As she reflected Makoto knew she could have done a better job of being there for him, loving him the way he deserved to be loved. But, emotionally she mas as well have been across an ocean. She knew deep down as much as she said she loved him that she was lying to herself, her heart had never belonged to Akira.

A single tear fell from her right eye and rolled down her cheek before hitting the floor as she truly realized the gravity of what his letter had done for her. He had loved her so much that he knew the only way to truly allow for both of their happiness was to free her from the bonds their relationship restrained her in, as much as it broke his heart she needed a clean slate without him to hold her down.

“oh shit… Fuck” she looked down and the dinner was smoking. Luckily, she had saved it before it had burned. The front door opened and Sae walked in, “Sis … your home… I thought you would be working late tonight” “I know Makoto but I realized it had been awhile since we had done something more than eat a meal together. I thought maybe we could watch a movie tonight and hang out…” the older Niijima scanned her sisters face for approval, “oh… wow… that would be fun but actually Akira is coming over for dinner we had some things we needed to talk about and I had class this morning so… I invited him over for dinner” Makoto tripped over her words she knew this would upset her sister, it was not often Sae tried this hard to make sure they spent time together. Their schedules often didn’t match up, and Sae had been working longer hours at the SIU…”on second thought… Sis..I can call him and cancel if you want. Its really not often we get to spend time together” Makoto smiled as she hoped it would make her sister happy her face had fallen once Akira’s name had been brought up.

Sae was still stick on his name _Akira… coming… to... our…house … for dinner. NO!_ She was trying to rid herself of the boy turned man, not spend more time than she had to with him. At the same time, she remembered the previous summer after he left feeling her own heart beak as her sister suffered. She thought her sister was heart sick over this boy, that he had left her behind. She watched Makoto’s grades slip for the first time and finally had to intervene.

“Makoto, I do not want what happened last summer to happen again. You are playing a dangerous game involving yourself with that boy again. You cannot let him interfere with your dreams or your duty to yourself and our family. “ Sae was not sure if she was trying to convince Makoto to give up on Akira or herself but the strength of her words faltered towards the end, her mind slipping towards the man who stood before her only yesterday.

Their conversation was interrupted by a knock at the door, “I guess its too late now.” Sae said begrudgingly opening the door. 

“Hi Sae- San I am here to see Makoto, is she home?” Akira gave a genuine smile holding out some flowers for both of them as a gesture of good will.

Her heart felt like it was going to beat out of her chest. She could feel heat radiating from her cheeks and her mind was racing a mile a minute. “Shes in the kitchen making dinner, I was just on my way out” Sae growled knowing she was projecting her anger at herself and the situation at the young man before her.

“Sis Stay…” she heard Makoto call softly

“Makoto, I can’t …I have work to do. I guess it is too late to go to the office. I will take it to my room. Please make sure I am not disturbed.” Sae Quickly gathered her laptop and her purse and exited the room. She hoped neither Akira nor Makoto realized the truth.

 

Akira walked to the dining room table. Dinner had already been set out for the two of them. Makoto made her way to the table with drinks.

“Thank you for coming to dinner Akira-kun” Makoto blushed a bit as her mouth hung on his name

“There is no way I would have missed it for anything” Akira honestly didn’t know what else to say. He was unsure as to what he had walked into.

Silence punctuated their dinner. Each of them waiting for the other to make a move. Each of them not knowing what to say first.

“I’m Sorry!” they both finally broke the silence in unison.

He placed his fork down and moved beside her grabbing her right hand and looking into her eyes. “Let me go first” his grey eyes felt as though they were piercing her soul.

“Makoto, you have always been my best friend the person that I turn to when I am troubled and the only woman I ever loved. What I did sending you a letter like that and cutting you out of my life was unforgivable. I was a scared boy who thought I didn’t know how to love. The distance plus my depression and isolation made me feel like I didn’t deserve you… Like I wasn’t able to love you the way you needed to be loved…So I ran and in the process, I lost sight of myself, I lost my best friend.” He paused searching her face for any sign of emotion, it was blank she had retreated in to the deep recess’ of her mind and she was freaking out.

_He wants to get back together. I can’t …I thought he knew… I thought he just wanted to be friends. What is going on here I can’t think straight. Oh god… oh god…. Oh no… fuck._ Her mind was racing a million miles per minute, in a million years she never would have thought this would be the result of sitting down with Akira.

Finally, after opening and closing her mouth what seemed like 20 times Makoto forced herself to make a sound and quickly blurted out “ I can’t do this Akira… I can’t I am in love with someone else. I always have been.” She blushed and pulled her hand away from him.

Akira look dumbfounded for the first time since she had known him he seemed to be at a loss for words. Finally, after an eternity he opened his mouth to say something.

“who is he?” Akira asked looking down at the dinner still at the table a ting of sadness lingered on his words. “Its Ryuji, isn’t it? I always say the way you argued with each other, the way he teased you when even I couldn’t… it’s always been him hasn’t it? That’s why you were so content to let me fade away!” Akira slammed his fist on the table out of anger, then tears started to stream down his cheeks as if his heart was breaking for the first time.

Makoto was stunned to silence… after all this time… after that letter… This was where they stood. _Fuck… she had to tell him. How was she supposed to do this, she had just recently admitted this to herself. She hadn’t even told Sae. She had to tell someone … fuck…why did it have to be him… why did it have to be like this…_

“Akira… Akira…calm down… It’s not Ryuji…”

Akira cuts her off midsentence “so its Yusuke then…”

“Akira shut up and fucking listen to me… This is important”

 “What is going on out here… do I need to kick him out of the house?” Sae bursts out of her bedroom unable to do any work after being disturbed by the yelling coming from the dining room.  She focused her gaze on Akira. “what did you do?”

“Sis…” “it’s ok. I guess you might as well listen to this too” Makoto sighs trying to collect her thoughts. She knows it’s now or never.

“Makoto…” Sae looks at her sister there is intense fear in her eyes. Where a strong woman once stood now stand the scared little girl she remembers from their childhood. A silence falls over the room it is almost deafening. Makoto opens her mouth to speak, then shakes her head several times looking at the ground, she is unable to make eye contact with either one of them.

“ I don’t want to disappoint you sis” she finally says looking at say an intensity behind her striking red eyes. “I know you thought I have always carried a torch for Akira, I let you and everyone else believe that because it was easier than the truth…” She paused and looked at Akira searching his eyes for something… “I have been going through the motions and living a lie, I have lied to all of you and I have lied to myself for so long that I almost lost who I was….”

“What do you mean Makoto… I don’t understand” Sae jumped in using her investigators voice, it always seemed to be her default when she was uncomfortable or unsure.

“Please let me finish I don’t know if I will be able to if you keep interrupting me sis” Makoto said pleadingly hoping Sae would get the point.

“Look Sis I never wanted to bring shame on our family or disappoint you. You are the most important person in my life and you have sacrificed so much so that I can have the opportunities I have now. I always thought it would be unfair to you to just add one more thing. And Akira, you truly are my best friend I wouldn’t trade any moment we shared together. I do love you.” Makoto paused as she blushed thinking about the first time she told him she loved him, “But I am not in love with you. I thought you understood when you wrote me the letter, that is why It felt like I abandoned you because I went out and worked on myself. I was honest with myself and truly understand who I am now.” Makoto faltered for a moment losing herself in his eyes which had grown increasingly confused. Finally, she just said what she had been holding back this entire time.

“You never truly held my heart because I am and always have been in love with Ann.” She felt all the air expel from her body and she was breathless. It was finally all out in the open…The room fell silent almost in unison Akira and Sae looked Makoto in the eyes and then looked at each other, both dumbfounded and at a loss for words.

Finally, Sae stepped towards Makoto and did the most un Sae thing she had ever done. She pulled her sister into a tight embrace and sobbed on her shoulder with Makoto joining her in the moment. They cried for different reasons Sae because she felt like if it were not for her Makoto would not have been trapped in this gilded cage of responsibility and what she thought was right to protect the family. If it weren’t for her she could have been honest and not had to live a lie for so long. Her tears were those of regret and shame for the hurt she caused her sister. Makoto wept for a happier reason because she was finally free of this burden that had weighed her down for so long and even without words she knew her sister accepted her and in that moment, that was enough…. If nothing else went her way knowing she had someone on her side was something she could hold onto.

When they finally released each other, Makoto wiped the tears from her eyes and her gaze transferred to Akira who was still standing there. His gaze was not angry or judgmental, instead it was kind and thoughtful almost welcoming.

When he finally opened his mouth, there was only one thing he could bring himself to ask. He grabbed Makoto’s hand looked her in the eyes and finally asked the only question that matted.

“Does she know?”


	3. Roll the Dice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Akira realizes like in Tokyo will not be as easy as he had hoped.

Makoto blushed turning a bright shade of red. “of course Ann doesn’t know, it would be so much easier if she did. But, I doubt she even feels the same way.” There was a deep tinge of sadness punctuating her voice as she spoke. The only time Akira had ever heard her this way was when they were going through Sae’s palace and she was struggling with the distorted person her sister had become.

Makoto moved away from Akira and began to busy herself by clearing the table. “I am sorry Akira I know this isn’t what you wanted to hear.”

“Makoto stop! Honestly, I am not as shocked as you think. I have always wanted one thing for you and that is your happiness.” Akira paused for a moment, he wanted to find the right words. “ I think I always sort of knew deep down that we were not right together, even when we slept together it always felt like you were holding back from me… “

Sae grimaced at the thought of her sister and the former leader of the phantom thieves being “together” in that way. She always knew it was a possibility but did her best to manage the time when she saw them together… She then recalled how distracted she had been searching for the Phantom Thieves… _of course they had time to… I wasn’t there for her…_ Sae’s heart broke a little bit. She remembered how she had neglected her sister, How, she had blamed her for ruining her life. _Of course, she didn’t talk to me about these things…I wouldn’t have talked to me either_ Sae thought painfully.

“Makoto don’t worry you have actually helped my heart become whole again” Akira put his hand behind his head and smiled.  “I feel like I have my friend back.”

His words helped bring Sae back to reality…

A small tear rolled down Akira’s cheek his normally polished exterior had been replaced by a man who was broken. Both Niijima sisters were surprised at his rapid change in demeanor.

“I have been really broken the past year. That’s part of the reason I came back early. Honestly, I thought my letter to you had ruined all of my friendships. I understood when I didn’t hear from you again… I knew what I did was hurtful and I pushed you away because I felt like I didn’t deserve to be loved…”

Sae winced at his revelation, she had long felt the same thing for herself. Eschewing personal relationships for work, she never let anyone get to close and always kept others at arm’s length. She didn’t trust others enough to not hurt her. Her heart was a heavily guarded fortress because it had to be she didn’t want to be seen as weak, or incompetent, or emotional. Her life was just a series of motions she went through each day, the loneliness was just the price she paid for personal success.

Akira calmed down and continued “when you stepped away from me Makoto everyone else followed. They blamed me for breaking your heart. They blamed me for running away…  Instinctively they picked sides even though neither of us ever asked them to… even Morgana he came back to Tokyo and has been living with Haru. I was left alone… it was of my own creation but I have been in a very dark place the past year.”

“Akira-kun” Makoto reached her hand out and instinctively caressed his face wiping away the tears as her hand stopped and cupped his cheek. “I always thought it was ok because you had the others…I can’t believe I was so wrong”

“You had your own stuff obviously, and so did they. It seemed there always was an excuse. So after a while I stopped reaching out. I let my hometown become my prison. I was bullied daily for my past mistakes, my parents were punished for me, their house was constantly vandalized. I worked as hard as I could to distract myself from it all I earned top grade’s and was able to perform come exam time because I knew I had to get back to Tokyo. But, honestly there were days where I didn’t think I would make it. “ He lowered his head in shame. Both Sae and Makoto looked at each other they knew what that look meant, his façade was gone and all that remained was the real Akira, there was no impish grin, no flirtation, only the rawness of his broken spirit.

Sae couldn’t help but feel responsible given his revelations. If she had not asked him to testify he would never had gone to juvenile hall for breaking his probation… maybe then the world would have seen him for the hero he was … and not the criminal he was made out to be. He had done it to help her, and to protect his friends and in the end… no one had been there for him.

Almost instinctively he looked at Sae’s face... “Niijima-san stop beating yourself up. This isn’t your fault.” She looked at him in shock wondering how he knew what she was thinking.  _Of course he knew..._ “If given the choice I have no doubt I would turn myself in” Akira stopped and searched her face for approval, but there was nothing.

Akira stood up “I really should go, thank you for dinner Makoto.” He turned to Sae “ It was nice to see you again SIU director Niijima” his impish smile returned for a moment as he said her name. She hung on each word. _Stop it Sae this is inappropriate… your sister slept with him… there are a million reasons why this will never work… just say no._ “Good night Akira, and I think we are too the point where you can just call me by my name…just call me Sae.” “Ok then good night Sae, it was nice to see you again.” Her heart flittered in her chest.

She knew she was blushing but hoped Makoto didn’t notice. Quickly she headed towards her room. “Makoto, we will talk later. You do not have to go through this alone” she spoke over her shoulder as she headed inside.

“I know sis…” Makoto yelled as she turned off the lights. She felt lighter after their discussion and yet she couldn’t believe the others had not taken care of Akira like she had hoped. She can’t believe her own emotions had betrayed her friend so much, she had no idea the hardship he went through to save her… and her sister. Even in a time of great triumph and joy her heart was heavy with sorrow.

She was brought back to reality by a message on her phone. It was Ann. She blushed and smiled as she looked at the message.

                  **Hey, how did everything go with Akira? Are you ok?**

**It was really hard. Things have not been easy for him.**

**I know he told me last night.**

**I think we need to hold a group meeting.**

**Your right. The others don’t even know he is back in town. I hope Ryuji doesn’t punch him.**

**It will be ok. We all need to come together and be there for him now.**

**Hey Ann… do you think we could hang out tomorrow before we meet with the others.**

**Sure, I think it will be good to come up with a strategy.**

Makoto clutched her chest, her heart was racing. God how was she going to be honest with Ann. She really didn’t want to lose their friendship yet Akira was right as usual. “I just need to tell her” she quietly whispered to herself.

                  **Let’s meet at Shibuya station we can figure out what to do from there.**

**Sure, I will see you there after my morning shoot.**

Makoto laid her phone on the night stand. She was too emotionally drained to fight sleep even as fear and anxiety collected in the pit of her stomach. She drifted off knowing things were about to change.

Akira pulled himself into bed completely drained in a way he hadn’t felt since he was a Phantom Thief. As he drifted to sleep something caught his eye. There was a shadow running towards him scurrying on the floor suddenly it jumped up on to the bed and settled onto his chest. “Akira!” Morgana yelled nuzzling into his face.

Akira was not read to have a heart to heart with the cat right now. All he wanted was sleep. “Hi Mona, can we chant in the morning?” he finally managed to get sounds across his lips, but exhaustion took hold and he finally drifted to sleep. The cat curled up beside him, almost instinctively protecting his best friend. Their reunion would come. He just hoped he was not too late…

 

Akira was startled awake by a commotion coming from downstairs. “Where is that asshole, He needs to learn some fucking manners” He heard a male voice yelling. It was quickly followed by an older man telling them to calm down and have some food. Akira quickly put on some clothes and headed downstairs Morgana was already sitting at a booth. Suddenly a fist came flying out of nowhere causing Akira to duck and hitting the wall with a bang “Mother fucker” Ryuji Slumped down on the floor holding his hand, tears streaming down his face.

“Ryuji, I told you to wait that I would deal with Akira.” Morgana yelled angrily.

Sojiro came out of the kitchen to find the young man on the floor with Akira standing over him and the cat meowing wildly. “I am going to go get Dr. Takemi. You two sit down and figure out your issues while I am gone.” The old man said harshly.

Akira bent over and offered a hand to Ryuji, it was un ceremoniously swatted away. “I don’t need your help. I have done just fine the past year without you. Now you show up out of the blue and my girlfriend comes home in tears… no man fuck you. This is not ok.”

“What do you mean your girlfriend?”

“Haru and I are together. how do you think that damn cat ended up here.”

Akira lowered his head, life really had moved on in his absence “I am sorry I didn’t know.”

“Well now you do. I think it would be best if you just stayed away from us all of us. We were just fine without you man.”

Ryuji picked himself off the floor and limped toward the door. At that moment Sojiro walked in with Dr. Takemi She took one look at his hand and assumed it was broken most likely in several places.

She looked at Akira “I will deal with you later.” Her gaze shifted “For now Ryuji come with me we will fix that hand”

Akira slumped into the booth in the back a look of defeat crossed his face. “How did everything become so messed up. How did we get here Boss?”

Morgana look at him for the first time he realized just how broken he was, Joker no longer existed and instead he had been replaced by a shell of a man floating through life. Truth be told there was no joker without his friends.

Sojiro looked at the man who had been like a son to him and sighed. “It will be ok kid, they will come around.”

 

Sae was in the kitchen fixing herself a cup of coffee. She took a sip and wished it was as good as the coffee he made her at Lablanc. She shifted back to reality and noticed Makoto was uncharacteristically still in her room.

“Makoto are you alright” Sae called from the other side of the door.

“Yeah sis… I’m fine” She paused “actually can you come in here and help me” 

Sae obliged and entered what seemed to be a warzone clothes were thrown all over the room Makoto stood there with her head in her hands frustrated.

“what happened here?” Sae was taken aback she had never even seen one item out of place in here sisters room now it looked like someone dropped a bomb full of clothes all over her floor.

“I don’t know what to wear...” Makoto sighed holding back tears “What says I have been secretly harboring a crush on my best friend forever… please don’t reject me”

“Makoto” the older Niijima said softly she was not used to this kind of vulnerability and didn’t quite understand how to support her though this difficult time.

“I just want everything to be perfect” Makoto started picking through more clothes. She finally settled on a white summer dress over leggings she put on a pair of sandals she had gotten with Ann at this store in the underground mall in Shibuya station

Makoto finally looked at her sister. She didn’t need to say a word to get an answer.

“You look amazing Makoto.” Sae marveled at the beautiful strong woman her sister had become. In a way, she looked up to her now. Makoto was so brave and unwilling to let the world dictate who she had to be, it made Sae envious of her freedom…

“you know sis… you can be happy too if you really want it. I will never stand in your way.”

Makoto’s statement seemed so out of place, Sae was dumbfounded for a moment. She paused wondering how her sister could be so wise beyond her years sometimes.

“Maybe” Sae was fighting her logical brain, she hoped her clear interest in Akira had not been noticed, and yet it seemed as if Makoto had given her, her blessing.

Makoto rushed out the door already 10 minutes late and not wanting to keep Ann waiting for much longer.


	4. The House Always Wins

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ann and Makoto come together to discuss how they can help Akira, but how will they fair when they must look inside themselves to find the real keys to their own happiness.

“Come on Ann just one more set this light makes you look fantastic” the photographer roared over the emerging crowd. Everyone wanted to catch a glimpse of the model are she posed during her shoot. A smile reached across her face and there was joy in her bright blue eyes as each photo turned out better than the last.

Still her mind was hiding the darkness for the past few days. The moment the cameras stopped shooting a cloud filled her eyes and her heart was filled with sorrow for the boy who had recently returned to them a broken shell of a man. He had helped her find the confidence within herself to become an international super model. He had seen past her raw sexuality into the person she was deep down and had never wavered in their friendship.

They had lost touch was how she justified it. Yet deep down she had made a choice to forget what they shared. It was part of the shame she carried with her now _he will find new friends_ was what she thought as she rationalized her choice. _He doesn’t need us any longer_ was how she felt after she learned of the letter he had sent to Makoto. So, she made a choice to forget, to let the memories of Akira become distorted and to move on with her life. She didn’t date, she just worked and saw her friends when she wasn’t traveling. It made for a very lonely life at times but she had succeeded in ways she never thought were possible.

Ann changed her clothes in a hurry, she was already late. As she slipped her tank top over her head she opened the lock on her phone and sent a message.

                  **Mako-chan I am so sorry my shoot ran over. I will be there as soon as I can.**

**Its ok Ann I am running late myself. See you soon.**

Ann was taken aback by Makoto’s admission of tardiness that was very unlike her, but she was not willing to turn down good fortune especially if that meant Makoto would not be yelling at her for being late … again.

Both women rounded the corner to their designated meeting spot. Makoto caught a glimpse of Ann and felt all the air in her lungs leave her body, she stopped feeling the weight of what she was about to do collect on her chest like a million Magaton raids to the chest.

Ann saw her and waved “Mako-chan over here” Both women embraced and smiled. It had been months since they had done something together just the two of them.

“I am so happy we could do this Ann; do you think it would be alright if we found some place quiet where we can talk?” Makoto was nervous but her demeanor showed nothing but confidence.

Ann laughed “of course Mako-chan there is no reason to be so serious. Why don’t we go to the diner on central street it should be quiet enough.”

The older woman agreed and they made their way to central street talking about mundane things as they went. By the time they had arrived Ann had covered the weather while Makoto had talked about school and how weird her sister was acting.  They both decided to grab a quiet table in the back and each ordered some bubble tea and a crepe to share as Ann didn’t want to eat it by herself.

They talked and laughed for half an hour before the cloud darkened both of their hearts again. “Mako-chan we need to talk about it” Ann said solemnly breaking the awkward air that had accumulated around them.

“I know Ann… I just… I just don’t know what to say. I feel so lost.”

“Akira is different.  He is broken, we have to help him find himself again. I can’t help but feel like we are partially to blame.” Ann put her hands on her cheeks in shame unable to fully express her regret.

“ No Ann I alone am to blame… I thought after the letter you all would just pick up the pieces. You all would choose him when I couldn’t. I had no Idea we all would just abandon him like a distant memory.”

Makoto had a tear running down her cheek as she went to dry it off the younger woman moved from across from her to next to her. She could feel her cheeks blushing a rosey shade of pink.

“Ann I need to tell you something before we go any further”

Makoto could not wait any longer she had to tell Ann how she felt it was the only way to free herself from the emotions that had enslaved her for so long. If she was going to help Akira get back to the glory of his former self she would need to be honest and set herself free as well.

Ann looked at her friend and blinked blankly, she was not ready for what was to come but she trepidatiously agreed to listen.

Makoto looked at Ann and felt her heart grow, she swooned as she looked deeply into the blue sea that drifted forever into Ann’s soul from her eyes. She was digging deep to find the words to explain how she felt, when Ann put a finger to Makoto’s lips startling her and stopped her from proceeding further.

“ Mako-chan I have something I need to confess as well. It can’t wait… would you mind if I went first” Ann spoke with hurried resolve like she may explode if she didn’t speak the words right at that moment.

Makoto was stunned into silence she nodded her head to allow the younger woman to proceed.

“Well you know how I have never really dated anyone. I mean yeah there was that one time I went out with Ryuji but that was a disaster from the word go…. Kissing him was like what I imagine it would feel like to Kiss a brother if I had one”

Makoto nodded still unsure where this was going.

“I have always felt like there was one person I could turn to to be there for me when everything felt like it was collapsing around me, even when I was alone and traveling you were always there for me Mako, and so when Akira sent you that letter and it felt like your world was collapsing I knew I had to be there for you, even if it meant hiding my own truth to help you get better. I honestly never thought love would be in the cards for me because I have carried a torch for one person since the day I realized there was more to them than I thought… “

“Ann” her name escaped Makoto’s lips it lingered like fresh air as Makoto moved closer to her. She put her hand on top of Ann’s causing the younger woman to halt mid-sentence.

“Ann I thought I was alone all this time. That’s part of why I came here to talk to you today. I needed to clear the air about who I am and about the letter.”

“Mako I don’t care about…” Ann began to protest

“Ann Listen to me this is important” Makoto spoke over her searching for some sort of comfotrt in her face.

Both women fought to find the right words _Just tell her._ Akira’s voice echoed harshly in both of their minds almost taunting them.

In unison, they both turned to one another and looked deeply into the eyes of the woman each had loved for so long and blurted out “I LOVE YOU”

Makoto broke first, tears began to stream down her face in disbelief. “after all this time?” was all she could muster as Ann moved closer to embrace the only person who could make her flutter.

“Yes silly, I thought you would never be interested in me given your history with Akira. I wanted to move on so many times but my heart always brought me bake to you. You were always it for me”

“You don’t know how long I have waited to hear you say those words. Even now I am pinching myself in disbelief this must be a dream…I have life in fear for so long I guess I didn’t think we would ever get here.”

“You know what’s crazy?”

“What”

“I would have never gotten to this point if it were not for Akira. We had a heart to heart two nights ago. I never told him I loved you but it was like he knew. All he said was you have to tell her Ann.”

Makoto felt her throat go dry _I can’t believe he knew even before he went to my house… and…oh my god…he wasn’t there to profess his love for me…_ She slammed her fist on the table “That bastard”

“Mako … what is it”

“Akira knew when I saw him yesterday… he had always known. Yet he came to dinner and professed his love for me. It started a fight where I came out to him and my sister… That was always the plan…He knew the truth even if I was unwilling to admit it to myself… In his depressed worn-down state, he was still making my life better and leading me down the path of my own truth.” Makoto cried into Ann’s shoulder. “before he left last night he said just tell her Makoto”

  _After all this time, he was still sacrificing himself for them… even though they had abandoned him he had never really left his friends behind their happiness was always at the forefront of his mind._

“Ann can I ask you something before we go…”

“Sure Mako… what is it”

The older woman grabbed her hand and looked into her eyes “ I have waited a long time to ask you this, Will you be my girlfriend?”

Ann threw her arms around Makoto she didn’t care who saw as she planted a deep passionate kiss on her lover, memorizing each faucet of her lips as she pressed softly into them with her own. Makoto could feel the hungry desire behind her kiss it was eclectic and sent a shockwave through the entirety of Makoto’s body. They parted both looking at the other both breathless with longing and desire.

Ann moved to get up first and on her way out of the booth grabbed her loves hand. They left the diner together. Both their hearts both felt fuller than they had in a long time.

They both knew this moment had to be savored as it would be all too short. They now had to do right by the man who knew their hearts even before they could come to grips with their truth themselves. He saved them weather he knew it or not. Now it would be their turn to fight for his happiness.


	5. The Ace up his Sleeve

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sae spends the morning alone with Akira...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This got very smutty but i am really enjoying the idea of these two having a torrid affair.

Sae looked at the clock is was 2 am and she was no closer to falling asleep. Ever since she had interrogated the leader of the phantom thieves over a year ago she had suffered from insufferable insomnia. That case had always been her white whale, she regretted her own desires and the way it made her heart cold to those around her.  She also often wondered if she had become a good person through the reveal process. 

Sure her heart had changed because she was not irredeemable but at her core she was still a workaholic who had a hard time forming normal relationships with others.

Most interactions were treated with skepticism and even though she tried really hard to be close with Makoto she knew deep down that she was not a warm person. Her entire being was driven by a sense of duty, justice, and success. Love for others never really fit into that mold.

Sae surprised even herself when she looked at the time, closed her laptop, and decided to get a cup of coffee before she headed to the office. At this point it was 5 am, there was only one place she wanted to go and it was the exact opposite direction from her work…. It would not be the last time she did something she considered questionable that day.

_ What am I doing, I bet Leblanc isn't even open.  _ Sae tried to think of a reason why she should just head to work. Yet something was overriding her head and her feet kept pushing her ever closer towards Lablanc.

When she arrived Sae found the sign flipped to closed.  _ See I told you… now you wasted time. This was not worth it.  _ Her head chastised her actions practically screaming at her to turn around and just go to the office.

A light came on inside as a sleepy young man walked down the stairs shirtless and rubbing his eyes.

_ God he looks good.  _ Sae thought as he approached the door admiring his chiseled physique. He had really grown into himself over the past year.   It was all she could do to knock some sense into herself.  _ He is too young, and your sister's ex… get ahold of yourself.  _ Her brain kicked into overdrive.  _ Keep it professional...it's just one cup of coffee. _

The door rattled open, causing her to forget the fight happening in her mind. She was face to face with him.

“ SIU Director Niijima” he said startled by her presence. “What do I owe such an early morning visit? I hope I am not under investigation again” he said giving a half smile.

“Cut the crap Kurusu I just really needed a cup of coffee, I had another sleepless night and this was as good a place as any” she really hoped he didn't see right through her.

Akira knew that there were many coffee shops more convenient to Sae’s downtown office, but in truth he felt happy that she was there.

_ Keep calm _ he thought. His palms were sweating profusely and it was all he could do to keep himself from blushing.

“Well we are not due to open for another 3 hours. I usually get up at this time to make myself a cup of coffee and train.”

Sae’s face fell.  _He knows… this is his way of getting me to leave… I knew this was a bad idea. What if he tells the others… Makoto_

Her mind was racing… she needed to figure out a way out of there.

“why don't you come in, I wouldn't mind sharing a cup of coffee with our nation's top prosecutor.” He put his hand behind his head running his fingers through his already tousled dark hair. 

His half smile was reassuring to Sae, she entered the tiny cafe and took a seat at the counter.

Akira began to work on two pour over coffees keeping himself busy and trying to ignore his very really attraction to the beautiful prosecutor before him.

Silence filled the room neither of them really quite knowing what to say. Sae was never big on small talk and it took all of Akira's strength no to walk around the counter and take her right there.

In his mind she was the picture of strength and beauty, tall with legs for days and long silver grey hair he just wanted to run his fingers though. He had been attracted to her the first time they met but had always felt she was out of his league. When he decided to date Makoto he had closed the idea of being with Sae out of his mind… it was always an impossibility.

Even before Akira had sent Makoto the letter, he had always thought Sae hated him. He did get her sister involved in some pretty crazy things after all… plus there was the whole taking Makoto’s virginity thing… yet here she was seeking him out.

Akira pushed a cup of coffee in front of Sae, raising one eyebrow in anticipation of her judgement.

“Mmmmm” Sae moaned as she breathed in the aroma taking her first sip and feeling the warmth of the beverage as it made its way from her mouth and down her throat. “ You do make the best coffee Kurusu. I don't know how you do it” it was just enough of a compliment for him.

He set a second cup at the seat next to her and made his way around the counter. He got about a half step in front of her before he couldn't take it anymore. He turned her to face him and pushed his lips against her passionately.

_ Is this happening..  oh fuck… _ was all Sae thought as the warmth of his lips enveloped hers.  _ I...I...This can't happen... _

Sae did not know what to do, all the alarms going off in her head were overshadowed by how right it all felt. She moved her hands to push him away and instead let Akira draw her closer wrapping her arms around him.

Akira squatted down refusing to break their kiss and picked the older woman up. He carried her up the stairs and into his bedroom. Sae really felt the strength he had developed over the past year as she felt weightless in his arms.

Akira laid Sae down on the bed as they both finally came up for air.

“Sae-san, are you sure this is ok?” Were the only words Akira could muster. The overly confident flirtatious boy had been disarmed and stripped away, replaced with a man who wanted to fulfill her every desire.

“Yes Kurusu..” she moaned positively biting her lower lip.

“Please just call me Akira… I want you to use my name when you moan”

Sae nodded in agreement and pulled her lover to her lips not wanting to waste another second.  The kiss was passionate and full of lust for each other.

Akira stood up and began to break her free of the clothes that obscured her body from his gaze. Uncovering a matching Bra and pair of black lace panties underneath the flattering suit his lover normally wore. Akira took a moment to admire all of her. Sae bit her lip again still admiring his chest and strong arms.

Akira's only desire was to worship every inch of her body. His eyes longingly probed every inch of her body carefully choosing a place to start. 

Akira kneeled before his lover kissing the inside of her thighs as she moaned softly with each new touch and sensation. He started to kiss the lace obscuring her pussy, he felt the wetness on his lips and sucked it into his mouth. He slowly removed her panties and tossed them aside. Looking as her wet engorged lips. The entirely of her vagina was shaved, her juices glistened on her her outer lips. It was all so inviting, Akira felt her breath hitch as his tongue plunged inside her.

“Oh my God" Sae moaned as he went to work worshiping her with his mouth. He could feel how tight she was as he probed her with his tough and attempted to insert a finger inside her.

Her first orgasm came shortly after as he used he sucked her clit into his mouth and gently rubbed his tongue across it, Sae moaned in extreme ecstasy her juices covered his lips. He licked them as he came up for air not wanting to waste a drop of her cum.

Sae pulled him close to her lips and planted a passionate kiss on his lips gently running her hands down his body as she felt his hard member press against her. She wrapped her legs around his back and flipped him over situating herself on top, she gently ran one finger down his abdomen and pulled his sweatpants off in one movement.

There before here was his erect member standing up waiting for her. She took a moment to admire the sheer size and girth before her. While she had more than her fair share of men no one quite stood up to what lay before her in her mind.

Sae caught her breath before wrapping her luscious mouth around his cock. She gently ran her tongue across the tip feeling precum drip out into her mouth. As she put more of it in her mouth she began to bob up and down causing him to moan long and deep. Finally she came up for air.

“Mmnmm Akira I want you inside me so bad” Sae ran a finger across her lover's lips and she brought it inside his mouth and sucked on it longingly.

She stood up and situated herself above his waiting member, slowly lowering herself on his cock they both let out a deep moan. When it was finally inside her she began to move her hips back and forth feverishly squeezing his cock inside her tight pussy.

Akira reached up and gently massaged her gorgeous breasts slowly pushing her nipple between his thumb and forefinger. Her pace quickened. He knew at this rate neither of them would last much longer.  he pulled himself to her lips wrapping his hands around her neck as she rode them both a orgasm.

Akira let out a deep satisfied groan as he came inside her releasing all of his juices. At the same time Sae’s juices flooded her pussy mixing with his as she fell backwards on the bed.

The both lay there in ecstasy glowing from the electricity that still filled their bodies… both deeply satisfied in a way they had never felt before.

A bead of sweat rolled down Sae’s forehead her breathing had calmed and she turned to look at her lover. A smile crept across her face. For the first time in a long time she felt happy. The consequences no longer mattered, in this moment it was just them… no responsibilities, no past, only possibility.

Akira looked into her beautiful red/ brown eyes and although he wanted to say something he knew there were no words to describe how he felt right now. He simply wrapped his arms around her pulled her close into his embrace and lay there never wanting to let go.

Two cups of coffee sat on the counter in Lablanc cold and unfinished… the only remnants of the secret the two lovers shared that morning.


	6. The Game is Rigged

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Figuring out their "normal"

Akira opened the door a crack, quietly he assessed the hallway each door was shut which meant it would be safe for him to leave. He shut the door and sitting on the bed wearily he looked at his beloved and a smile crept across his face. He took a moment and put his clothes on carefully watching the clock as it flashed 3:12 am his eyes were a mix of euphoria and sadness as he pulled his jacket on and walked to the other side of the bed. He leaned down to meet the lips of his lover, she cried out half asleep mumbling don’t go and reaching for his hand. In his heart, he knew he wanted to stay more than anything in the world but that was not part of the agreement. He softly placed another kiss on her forehead.

 

“I love you” he whispered as he turned to leave. Once he reached the door he turned and took one last look. She was so peaceful when she slept, it made his heart flutter to see the smile on her face as she dreamed. _One day…_ was all he could think as he opened the door a crack and checked again just to make sure.

 

This was their normal. They snuck around and stayed out of the public eye. Akira never spent the night and Sae was always left longing for his touch each morning. It was how it had to be not just because of the differences in their social status and age. But because Sae, was the only public tie to the Phantom thieves left, and while institutional memory was short she was not insulated against the public scandal that would arise if she was seen dating the former leader of the Phantom Thieves. Everything was on the line for her… At times, she couldn’t help but feel envious of all the powerful men who had college age girlfriends behind their wives back, yet they were able to still be in power and their work was never questioned. _It’s not fair…_ it was something she thought about often. Yet at this point she was stuck in the game, She loved her job and had made a difference in Tokyo; She had cleaned up a scandal plagued SIU. Her sense of justice was balanced and fair, yet her heart was tied to a man she could never had publicly and that made it ache to no end.

 ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 

Two months had passed since Akira had moved home and everything had changed, yet in some ways it still remained the same. He finally had his own apartment near school. It wasn’t much just a simple one bedroom, decorated with relics from his days as a phantom thief, but it was his and it afforded him privacy he didn’t get at Lablanc. School had started and was going well, he quite liked most of his classes and really enjoyed his politics class, He seemed to have a natural aptitude for the subject. For the first time since the phantom thieves he felt like he wasn’t just floating through life without a purpose.

 

Yet, for all the good, Akira’s mind was still heavy and full of sadness. His depression was still crippling at times. His relationships with his friends were still strained. He had still been unsuccessful at mending his relationship with Ryuji. The last time ended with him and Ryuji trading punches the blonde hair boy was obviously drunk and screaming obscenities at his former best friend.

 

After months of no contact and exasperated Haru finally came to him.

 

“Akira, I shouldn’t be here but…I don’t know what to do this can’t continue…” A single tear had streamed down her face, she was trying to be brave in the face of everything that was going wrong.

 

“Haru, what is going on? I want to work on our friendship but he won’t even talk to me…His level of anger seems disproportionate to the action I committed…” a dark concern drew over his eyes

 

“You don’t know? I am confused because Ryuji makes it seem like you did everything on purpose.” Haru studied his face for recognition, yet Akira still felt confused.

 

“What do you mean by everything? I know you all were mad at the letter I sent to Makoto and the lack of contact…”

 

Haru cut him off “ Aki-kun… Ryuji was in love with Mako-chan when you first started dating her, He carried a torch for her. He tried to be there for her after the letter… but she pushed him away deeply hurting him. But, he could never take that anger out on her…”

Akira’s face dropped, her works were like a shot in the heart. He never realized he had hurt Ryuji with his actions. Of course, Ryuji was reacting this way… He looked at Haru’s eyes tears were slowly falling down her face, Akira could tell her heart lived in fear and agony. “Haru…He hasn’t taken any of his anger out on you has he…”

 

Haru’s face went blank and white, she stood there blinking “Aki-kun, Ryuji needs a friend, he needs you to be honest. The drinking has gotten worse he is angry at the world and I… I… I don’t know how much more I can endure. I know his heart belongs to me but Mako-chan is still a ghost in our relationship that haunts him… that haunts me.”

 

Akira pulled her into an embrace his grey eyes full of sadness _What happened to everyone? You all had come out of some pretty grim situations and when I left and everything fell apart…I tore everyone apart…_ His Mind was full of guilt and shame, His friends were really hurting and he couldn’t let that continue. “I am so sorry Haru.”

 

He let her cry into his shoulder and then suddenly she pushed him away and turned to leave “I have to go, Ryuji will be home soon… Please Akira.” And like that she was gone and he was left with his own thoughts.

 

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Makoto sat on the couch at the Niijima apartment, she was studying as usual for one of her criminal justice classes. The past two months had been filled with a mixture of elation and secrecy. School was going well but much of her time was spent studying which didn’t leave a lot of time for her to hang out with her friends. Her relationship with Ann also suffered due to her packed schedule and unwillingness to tell the others. Although the people who meant the most to her already knew, she was especially afraid of how Ryuji would react. Most of all she was afraid of what coming out meant and how her exploration of her own feelings about love and sexuality changed perceptions of her own reality.

 

Coming out had caused Makoto more than a few sleepless nights, she didn’t want to cause Ann more pain but the process seemed to be much easier for the blonde model.

 

Makoto’s thoughts we suddenly disturbed by a familiar beeping, quickly she searched the pile of books next to her for her phone.

 

**Hey Mako do you have plans tonight? I would love to see you <3**

Makoto’s heart fluttered as she kept coming back to the heart at the end.

 

**At home studying… Sae is out for the night you should come over :p**

After she sent the message she began to over think it… but she got an immediate reply.

 

**Good I think we need to finish our chat from the other night. Ill bring takeout.**

_Oh Crap, oh crap…_ Makoto immediately knew her girlfriend had a serious emotional night in mind. She was not sure she was ready for that kind of labor, but also understand how her continued insistence on remaining in the closet led to these kinds of conversations.

 

Before she knew it Ann was at the door holding up a bag from Big Bang Burger a smile on her face. Makoto’s heart instantly sped up at the sight of her beautiful girlfriend. She was so happy when Ann placed a quick chaste kiss on her lips as she rushed past her and into the kitchen.

 

As usual Makoto’s mind was racing, analyzing every possible decision she would make tonight… _Ok Makoto get your shit together. You want to make her happy, don’t you?_

 

Ann caught her staring off into space, “What are you thinking about?” she gave the cute inquisitive smile that Makoto loved…

 

“Oh… ummm.. you know me I am just not very good at all of this relationship stuff.”

 

“Mako This isn’t a palace, you do not need a tactic for every possible scenario, this is our lives and our relationship.” Ann began to get a bit exasperated, she was tired of repeating the same fight every time they saw each other.

 

“Ann… I just..I love having something that is just us that no one can take from us…”

 

“We both know that’s a copout. Mako we also both know the real reason so just say it, we can work though it together”

 

“Ann” her voice softened, it was almost child like “I…I…I…”

 

“Mako your making me anxious just out with it, don’t you think I would much rather enjoy what little time we get to spend together? Don’t you think I want to tell our friends who love both of us the truth? Don’t you think I want to stop having this fight… every… time… we… see …each other. I am so exhausted…” Ann’s face was red, Tears were streaming down her face

 

Makoto moved to touch her and Ann slapped her hand away “Don’t” she growled forcefully. “Just tell me”

 

Makoto began to sob, “I am worried about losing our friends…about what they will think of us… that they will not accept us… most of all I am worried that if I don’t come out to them you will stop loving me.” The words came out rushed and were filled with sobs.

 

Ann Looked deeply into her Girlfriends deep red eyes and wrapped her hand over the top of Makoto’s. “Mako you are forgetting the biggest part of having a partner. You are not in this relationship alone. Don’t you think I am afraid too?”

 

Makoto sniffled “you seem so sure Ann.”

 

“I am scared. but remember how fearless you felt when you were Queen…I always go back to being panther whenever I have the slightest doubt about all of this. When I was in my red suit and fighting shadows, I felt powerful beyond measure… It wasn’t just that carmen empowered me but being part of a team empowered me…”

 

_Her eyes sparkle when she is confident and caring_ Makoto blushed as she thought about how wonderful her Girlfriend was at making her feel safe and loved. “I am sorry” Makoto looked at the floor “your right we should tell everyone together If they cannot accept us then that is their loss not ours.” She looked up again to examine Ann’s expression…

 

It took a moment for Makoto’s words to register, in truth Ann was prepared for the fight to last well into the night and had not realized that Makoto may quickly see her side.

 

Finally, Ann’s mouth curled up into the smile Makoto longed to see. Sher threw her arms around her girlfriend and gave her a long loving kiss.

 

They finally parted and Ann Looked into her girlfriend’s eyes. “That is all I wanted Mako… for you to lean on me. I know this isn’t going to be easy especially with Ryuji but we can do this together.” Ann interlaced the fingers of her right hand with Makoto’s left hand and brought it to her lips. “I promise it will be ok” It was a whisper of a deeper promise, Makoto felt the words engulf her heart in a way she had never felt. One tear rolled down her cheek but this was not sadness or fear, it was intense joy.

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Sae paced back in forth behind her desk, it was a pattern she had become accustom to lately. She was not on top of her game and she knew it… she was distracted. Her thoughts were interrupted but the distinct **BEEP** coming from her phone.

 

**Dinner tonight?**

**At the office working…** Sae did her best to wave him off

 

**You need to eat even when you are working.**

She was surprised with how easily he could saw her with a sentence. This made her scared. Yet she was still drawn to him, he seemed to be the only person on earth who could disarm her icy exterior. She was so used to keeping everyone at arm’s length that her own vulnerability was almost refreshing.

 

**My Place one hour it better be good. I will let you know if Makoto is home so we can make other arrangements.**

**Sounds good. I will see you soon.**

Sae put down her phone and started collecting her things to go home, a smile crossed her face thinking about the night to come.

 

It was a game, they would see each other most nights one of them arriving well after dark and departing well before the world awoke… all to be with each other.  

 

Sae, pursed her lips as she thought about their perplexing situation. She knew she had fallen for him and was still unable to reconcile what that meant for both their lives.

 

 There was no way they could go back to being acquaintances like before, Akira had already captured her heart… and so she lived a second life in the shadows, one of vulnerability and softness that no other soul had seen.

 

Akira arrived a few moments after she got home. All her doubt melted away instantly when she looked into his grey eyes and felt his soft, warm, loving kiss.

 

She looked into his eyes as their lips parted remembering what he had said early that morning before he left. “I love you too Akira.”

 

He blushed completely disarmed by her profession of love. He did not think she had actually heard him earlier. A warmth crossed his chest as he pulled her closer. His actions said everything she wanted to hear and for a moment the universe was just them.

 

This existence between lines had become their new normal…One day they both hoped to make it their forever… but for now they would endure the secrecy if it meant another moment in each other’s arms like this one.


	7. Caught red handed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Life in the shadows in not what Saw and Akira thought it would be.

“Sae...I want more” Akira let the words roll off of his tongue as he traced the small of her back gently with his finger tips.

 

Sae was in a position she only ever put herself  with him..vulnerable. Akira couldn't see the expression on her face, but her body had become rigid and tense. He waited for a response with baited breath knowing her body language said it all. 

 

“We both know that isn't possible… not with who I am and... with who… you...you are” those last words particularly stung Akira.

 

Over the past few months they had each been more than happy to wander in and out of each other's lives meeting up in the evenings when they could. 

 

Their relationship had been forged in the shadows, built on stolen glances and private intimate moments. The only time they ever removed the mask and let themselves just be with each other was in the comfort of Sae’s room or Akira's apartment. 

 

“Sae, I don't want to have to sneak out of your apartment at 3 am anymore. I want to hold you until you wake up to go to work each day… I want to make you coffee and breakfast, I want to be the one who you call when you have had a bad day…” Akira trailed off placing a soft kiss on her shoulder wanting desperately to look into her brown eyes and see what she was thinking. 

 

Sae let out a sigh as tears started to stream down her face she tried to put up the prosecutor Niijima front but her mask kept crumbling.  _ I knew this was going to get complicated. God I am an idiot.  _

 

Akira had broken rule number one: don't get attached and that was an unforgivable sin in the older Niijima’s eyes...

 

“Sae please say something.” Akira said pleadingly

 

“Akira I think you should go.” Came out of her mouth coldly. 

 

Akira felt like he had taken a bullet to the heart “we both know you don't mean that, but if that is what you want…” tears started to roll down his face as he felt his heart crumble under the weight or her rejection.

 

Akira quickly put his clothes on “ you know how to find me if you change your mind. I won't wait for you forever.” He hastily left the room not even bothering to check if anyone else was home. 

 

Sae tried to hold back her tears as she quietly muffled her sobs with her pillow.  _ This is what you always do… someone gets too close and you push them away… you should go after him. _

 

Suddenly there was a crash in the kitchen a glass of water smashed on the ground shattering everywhere... “ what in the holy hell is this" Ann’s voice pierced the entire apartment… 

 

_ Fuck Akira you are so dumb.  _ Sae was desperately trying to find an excuse as to why the younger man had been there… her mind just kept centering on his mistakes…  _  this never would've happened if I had told him how I felt and not just the truth… _

 

As she was getting dressed she heard Makoto exit her room to see what the commotion was all about. “Ann are you ok?” 

 

“Yeah… I mean… Akira is here… and he startled me…”

 

“What do you mean Akira is here?” Makoto asked suspiciously “it's 2 am.”

 

Akira stood there dumbfounded. He was so angry. Angry at rejection, angry at being caught, and most of all angry at all the questions and explanation that would come next. 

 

For her part Sae had decided to use her courtroom skills and play shift the blame. “Makoto what are you and Ann doing here?” she feigned surprise and anger, knowing full well that Ann had been sleeping over regularly for months. 

 

“Really sis that's what you're going for… I know you are smarter than that.” Makoto had her hand on her hip her tone was almost mocking of the poor “criminal” Sae had become.

 

Sae looked at Akira in that moment she regretted sending him away. All she wanted was his comfort as she told her sister about their relationship. The only word she could muster was “Makoto…”

 

“Come on sis why don't we cut the pretense and you can explain exactly why my ex boyfriend is sneaking out of your room at 2 am” a smirk crossed Makoto’s face she knew she would win this argument for once.

 

Sae blinked sheepishly for once outmaneuvered by her younger sister. 

 

“Look Akira and I … Akira and I…” Sae tried to find the words but kept faltering. “Akira and i… we have been… we … have…” 

 

Makoto looked at Sae directly in the eyes, she crossed her arms across her body impatiently. Ann and Akira stood by with baited breath waiting for Sae to answer her younger sister. This was a role reversal neither of them had seen it was as if Makoto had put on her Queen mask and could take on the world. Meanwhile, Sae was almost cowering at a loss for words to describe her relationship with the younger man. 

 

Finally, the words left Sae’s mouth “ It's a sex thing" she immediately looked at Akira's eyes, the pain was evident. 

 

“Oh sis, I think we are all quite aware that it's a sex thing… the walls in this apartment are thin and your loud even though the pillow you use to muffle your screams.” Makoto unloaded years of pent up frustration on her sister in one sentence. 

 

The room was tense and filled with emotions bubbling over ready to explode at any second. 

 

Suddenly Akira broke the silence “ Makoto this was all me. After everything with us and you and Ann, I was lonely. Ryuji won't talk to me Haru and Morgana can't talk to me… Yusuke is off being famous, Futaba has actually made friends at school… and well you and Ann you’re figuring your own lives out together. I have been stuck in this rut feeling low and lost just watching time pass between work and school. Sae just got caught up in the middle of it all.” his eyes twinkled when he said her name, even under the circumstances he just wanted to touch and comfort her. 

 

It was Makoto’s turn to be at a loss for words. Of all the outcomes she had processed Akira falling on the sword for her sister. She was prepared to go at least a few more rounds in this fight.

 

“Akira that was sweet but I am an adult and I need to own up to my own stuff” Sae’s composure had returned she was all business

“I have fallen in love with Akira.” She turned to Akira “it's true, I love you. Kicking you out before was all an act… I want more too.” 

 

Ann looked at the two of them and then back at her girlfriend unsure of what side she was on or if there even was sides anymore. Makoto's disposition softened as she looked at the way Akira looked at her sister… it was familiar… it was the same way she looked at Ann.

 

“I don't know how to reconcile our relationship with the duties and responsibilities that come along with being SIU Director and the prosecutor responsible for putting away every person connected with Shido. I am the last public connection to the phantom thieves.” 

 

Akira reached out and stroked her face “ I love you Sae, we can figure it out and make it work.” 

 

For a brief moment they were alone in their own bubble when the silence was broken by the familiar sound of a phone… 

 

Ann looked at her phone and answered it. “Haru… are you ok” there was muffled crying coming from the other end. “Of course… no please come stay with me for awhile we will figure this out.” She mouthed I'm sorry to Makoto who had a concerned look on her face. 

 

“Sis this isn't over by a long shot, but it looks like we need to take care of our friend.” 

“ Akira… we will talk about this later… I think we have a lot to discuss.”

 

Ann hung up the phone. “Haru needs me… Mako she really needs both of us…but you know arriving together at this time of night would tip her off about us… are you ready for that.” 

 

Makoto turned white as a ghost… she stuttered and her breath hitched “I don't know Ann. I am scared… this is most likely the worst timing” 

 

Ann placed her finger on Makoto's lips and leaned in… “Mako … I love you no matter what you choose, and you are not in it alone” the words fluttered off her tongue as she whispered into Makoto's ear. 

 

Akira took that moment to squeeze Saes hand and let her know she was also not in this ordeal alone.

 

Makoto sat down on the couch paralyzed with fear… “Ann I can't…” 

 

“Mako… you can but I know you will when you're ready. I do have to go home and help Haru. I will text you tomorrow and we will figure things out together.” 

 

Ann gave her girlfriend a soft kiss and grabbed her purse not even bothering to change out of her pajamas, she opened the front door and called back to her beloved. “Mako I love you.”

 

Sae made sure her sister went to bed and was ok. Sh knew it was an emotionally tough day for her. Finally she grabbed Akira’s hand and led him back towards the bedroom. In front of the door she turned and looked in his eyes. “Will you hold me for the rest of the night? I don't want you to go.” His eyes said it all and he led her back inside stripping on her clothes and then his own. They feel asleep with her in his arms bodies enveloped in one another. 

 

In the morning Akira woke up, made his lover some coffee and cooked her breakfast just like he had always wanted too. He closed his eyes and enjoyed the quiet as his mind wandered toward the future. 

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> I hope you all enjoy. This is my second story so I am excited to try this whole writing thing. I am hoping to make this a series and will try to update on sunday's. Thank you for taking a chance on me and reading my work. :)


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